AG: Tell us a little bit about yourself and your family now, and how it's changed within the past few years. 

RH: It goes without saying that there have been several major life changes for me and my family over the past few years.  Following a very difficult period of severe pain and lose, the Lord began to turn my situation around towards the end of 2004.  First of all, the Lord brought a wonderful, godly man into my life, Rev. Steven Harvey.  After a very romantic, whirlwind courtship, (perhaps I’ll write about it someday), our marriage on May 14, 2005  resulted in a move to Portland, OR.  Then 15 months later, the Lord led us to Connecticut and blessed us with a wonderful church in the Farmington Valley.  In April of this year, we moved once again to Canton, CT so we could be closer to our church. Whew…. We absolutely love Connecticut and feel like we’ve finally found our home, the land of our calling! In addition to being a busy pastor’s wife, author and speaker, I am privileged to be involved with Ladies Ministries both as the CT District Ladies Ministries President and also as the National Daughters of Zion Director.  Additionally, I have continued with my writing ministry—to date I have written a total of 15 books including my children’s series.   My two latest books, The Shelf of Life and Open Door Policy detail a lot of my painful experiences along with the principles the Lord gave me to overcome these extreme difficulties.  All of my products are available for purchase on my website: www.abidingwords.com

AG: When did you first feel called to do a work for the Lord?

RH: I was about 15 years of age and can still remember the place and time of that Divine encounter in my life.  Sis. Louise Potter, a longtime friend and mentor was holding a revival at our church in Marion, IN.  During an altar call following one of her powerful messages, I responded to the tug of God’s Spirit.  While kneeling there on the left-hand side of the altar area, the powerful presence of the Lord came upon me and it was at that point in time I knew God was calling me to minister and there was a destiny for my life.  At the same time, Sis. Potter went to my parents and confirmed that calling without my telling anyone about what had just transpired.  Several years later, my parents told me about Sis. Potter’s prophetic confirmation which only served to strengthen my commitment and confidence in God’s Master plan for my life.   

AG: How do you view your calling now that you have survived so many tests and trails? I know that you now deal with the topic of healing quite a bit. How has life's situations equipped you to better minister and altered your burden?

RH: The calling of God is something I cherish beyond measure and I never want to do anything to become as the Apostle Paul so aptly put it, “a castaway” or an apostate minister.  Many years ago, I began praying a prayer that still remains a constant petition even to this day.  I began asking the Lord to help me become a vessel of honor that He can use and entrust and that I would never, ever misuse or abuse anything that He placed in my hands.  One of my dearest friends told me that she would shudder when she heard me pray that prayer because she knew that petition would send me down a tempering pathway of pain.  However, as a 4^th generation Pentecostal who was raised in a pastor’s home, I’ve seen far too many anointed, talented ministers fall away and that has always frightened me—I never want that to happen to me.  That is why I began to pray that prayer as a young person.  God knew everything that I would face and He has consistently taken the things the enemy wanted to destroy me with and has turned them into weapons of destruction for the enemy.  After passing through the “valley of the shadow of death” so to speak, it has given me compassion and empathy for hurting people in a greater measure than ever before because I literally feel their pain!!  As a result, I have been able to identify with and minister to many people that I never could have reached before.  In addition to my personal ministry and speaking engagements, I am also involved with ‘Help Me Heal’, which is a conference ministry that especially focuses on helping people who have been hurt by life.  For far too long, we have avoided talking and ministering about difficult issues such as divorce, abuse, abortion, eating disorders, etc.,  but the church is filled with hurting people and the House of God should be a place of healing and deliverance. The words of that old song still ring true today, even in the 21^st century: “Jesus is the Answer for the world today, above Him there’s no other, Jesus is the way….!”  Our Heavenly Father has the answer for everything!

AG: You once said that you would not trade your past experiences for anything, because it has taught you so much. What would you say to girls right now that are also being faced with a past of abuse, unstable home lives, and broken relationships?

RH: It is all about our response—life and the things that come at us cannot destroy us if we respond correctly.  Romans 8:37~39 details a litany of things that can come against us, but at the offset this passage declares, “in all these things, we are more than conquerors” through Jesus—the One who loves us.  A favorite Bible verse that became my motto during those tough times was Psalm 118:17, “I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the LORD.” This promise has been fulfilled over and over in my life.  In fact, this interview is just one more time and way that Jesus has given me an opportunity to declare His marvelous works in my life! And if Jesus can take the broken pieces of my life and put it back together better than it was before, then He can do the same for everyone.  He is a Master Redeemer and Restorer!  It never fails to amaze me how our mighty God takes what the enemy meant for evil and turns it for good, IF (a little conjunction with big consequences)we keep our hand in the Master’s and allow Him to have His perfect way in our lives.  Again, it is comes back to our response.  Life’s hardships didn’t destroy Joseph; instead they made him into an anointed useful vessel especially fit for God’s purposes.  Likewise, if we can learn to forgive those who have hurt us and leave the results with the Lord, He will use our painful experiences to prepare us for powerful places of usefulness that will blow our minds! 

AG: After a lady experiences disappointment and let downs from someone that is supposed to cherish and love her, whether it is a significant other or father figure, there is often such mental anguish and torment. Was I not good enough? Was I not pretty enough? These are thoughts that even young girls can experience from day to day. The devil often attacks a female's mind to distract her with worry and anxiety. How do you combat those feelings and thoughts?

RH: God’s Word has the answer for every circumstance and through the venue of prayer, His Spirit will sustain, heal and keep you.  That was my Source—day after day, I continue to get into the Word and into God’s Presence and here I am today—still standing!  Has it easy? NO!! There were days that I didn’t want to live anymore, but time and time again Jesus came alongside and carried me through.  Two of my major battles were with fear which was used for many years as a major means of control in my life and the other battle was with the Love of God.  Because I had been so deeply wounded by a spiritual authority figure, it caused me to think that perhaps that is how God viewed me. With my head, I knew Jesus loved me because His Word says so, but my heart had been broken and this caused a disconnect between my ‘head knowledge’ and ‘heart knowledge’.  Consequently, I began to ask Jesus to help me see Him as He really is and not through the eyes of my wounds.  Through the daily process of prayer and study along with working through the process of forgiveness (and forgiveness is definitely a process), I found a place of proper identity, healing and deliverance.  The beauty of this entire circumstance is that I am more whole inside and out than ever before in my life.  And that is just like my Jesus!

AG: For any mothers that might be reading this interview as well, how did you manage to support and encourage your daughters during a hard time in their home life? What are some ways that they can also help to protect their children in the midst of such an event?

RH: Two areas became my unrelenting focus during those dark days: God and my girls!  I spent a lot of time with Angel and Miriam, engaging in some very candid, open dialogue about everything that had happened to us.  It was my goal to create a safe environment where they could share their thoughts and feelings during this crazy upside down time in their lives.  This open forum helped them to process and work through their pain. One thing I never wanted to do was to sow bitterness, hatred or unforgiveness in them.  Many times parents use their children as pawns in these sort of sagas and that is the one of the worst mistakes in the world!!  Children should never be manipulated or abused in this manner as it could cause lasting, perhaps even irreparable damage. 

Angel and Miriam are both wonderful young ladies who are serving Jesus and love Him with all their heart. Their complete trust in God and positive outlook on life is yet another marvelous testament to God’s miracle working power!   Needless to say, my journey to wholeness has been their journey as well—it has been a joint venture.  They also had to learn to forgive, to trust again, and to be confident in Jesus Christ.  I have to say that it is an ongoing process and many times they have helped and encouraged me when I’ve had a down day. Throughout this entire process, my girls have become some of my best friends—we just enjoy being together. The godly influence of my husband has also been a wonderful stabilizing factor in each of our lives.  His integrity and steadfast walk with the Lord coupled with unconditional love has created a beautiful place of safety for us. Our home is filled with a lot of joy and laughter.  Steven has been a rock—a precious gift from the Jesus!

AG: Last but not least, what is one word of advice you would like to leave for any woman that is struggling to find direction and God's will for her life, when everything seems to be crumbling around her?

RH: The words of Jeremiah 29:11 hold great promise for each one of us: “For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” (NLT)  Jeremiah gave this promise to the nation of Israel during one of the darkest times in their history.  When all seemed lost, God inspired the prophet to pen this prophetic word of hope—life wasn’t over; divine plans were in store for a brighter future.  Likewise, in each one of our lives, even when everything is crumbling around us—life isn’t over.    Jesus is still in control!  The key to help you unlock the door to a brighter future is in your hand.  Just hold to God’s unchanging hand, keeping getting into His Word, learn to forgive and never stop praying.  God has great plans for a bright future for each one of us.  No matter what hand life deals to us, God can turn it around into a triumphant victory.  So, each day, make up your mind to get up, keep putting one foot in front of the other and with each step you will be closer to your promised hope and future.  The sun will shine again.  Count on it and keep believing!